The side of the plane SHEARS OFF!  Screaming PASSENGERS are

     sucked out into the night air, flying past the quivering

     wind.  Magazines and other objects fly everywhere.

 

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Life insurance pays off triple if you

                die on a business trip.

 

     Jack remains in his same position, same bland expression.

 

     DING! -- the seatbelt light goes OUT.  Jack SNAPS AWAKE.

     EVERYTHING IS NORMAL.  Some passengers get out of their

     seats.  From next to Jack, a VOICE we've heard before...

 

                            VOICE

                There are three ways to make napalm.

                One, mix equal parts of gasoline and

                frozen orange juice...

 

     Jack turns to see TYLER.  Without turned to Jack, Tyler

     continues:

 

                            TYLER

                Two, equal parts gasoline and diet

                cola.  Three, dissolve kitty-litter

                in gasoline until the mixture is

                thick.

 

                            JACK

                Pardon me?

 

     Tyler turns to Jack.

 

                            JACK (V.O.)

                This is how I met --

 

                            TYLER

                Tyler Durden.

 

     Tyler offers his hand.  Jack takes it.

 

                            TYLER

                You know why they have oxygen masks

                on planes?

 

                           JACK

                No, supply oxygen?

 

                            TYLER

                Oxygen gets you high.  In a

                catastrophic emergency, we're taking

                giant, panicked breaths...

 

     Tyler grabs a safety instruction CARD from the seatback,

     hands it to Jack.

 

                            TYLER

                Suddenly, we become euphoic and

                docile.  We accept our fate.

 

     Tyler points to passive faces on the drawn figures.

 

                            TYLER

                Emergency water landing, 600 miles

                per hour.  Blank faces -- calm as

                Hindu cows.

 

     Jack laughs.

 

                            JACK

                What do you do, Tyler?

 

                            TYLER

                What do you want me to do?

 

                            JACK

                I mean -- for a living.

 

                            TYLER

                Why?  So you can say, "Oh, that's

                what you do." -- And be a smug little

                shit about it?

 

     Jack laughs.  Tyler reaches under the seat in front of him

     and lifts a BRIEFCASE.

 

                            TYLER

                You have a kind of sick desperation

                in your laugh.

 

     Jack points to his own briefcase.

 

                            JACK

                We have the same briefcase.

 

     Tyler turns the top of his briefcase toward Jack.

 

                            TYLER

                Open it.

 

     Jack looks at Tyler, then pops the latches and raises the

     lid to reveal quaintly-wrapped bars of SOAP.

 

                            TYLER

                Soap -- the yardstick of civilization.

                      (reaches in his pocket)

                I make and sell soap...

 

     Tyler hands Jack his card.  "THE PAPER STREET SOAP COMPANY."

 

                            TYLER

                If you were to add nitric acid to the

                soap-making process, one would get

                nitroglycerin.  With enough soap, one

                could blow up the world, if one were

                so inclined.

 

     Tyler SNAPS the briefcase shut.  Jack stares.

 

                            JACK

                Tyler, you are by far the most

                interesting "single-serving" friend

                I've ever met.

 

     Tyler stares back.  Jack, enjoying his own chance to be

     witty, leans closer to Tyler.

 

                            JACK

                You see, when you travel, everything

                is small, self-contained--

 

                            TYLER

                The spork.  I get it.  You're very

                clever.

 

                            JACK

                Thank you.

 

                            TYLER

                How's that working out for you?

 

                            JACK

                What?

 

                            TYLER

                Being clever.

 

                            JACK

                      (thrown)

                Well, uh... great.

 

                            TYLER

                Keep it up, then.  Keep it right up.

 

     Tyler stands, looks towards the aisle.

 

                            TYLER

                ... As I squeeze past, do I give you

                the ass or the crotch?

 

     Tyler moves to the aisle, his ass toward jack, walks away...

 

                            TYLER

                We are defined by the choices we make.

 

     Tyler goes to the curtain dividing First Class, slaps the

     curtain aside and sits in an empty seat.  Jack watches.

 

                            JACK (V.O.)

                How I came to live with Tyler is:

                airlines have this policy about

                vibrating luggage.

 

     INT. BAGGAGE CLAIM AREA - NIGHT

 

     Utterly empty of baggage.  No people except for Jack and a

     SECURITY TASK FORCE MAN.  The Security TFM, smirking, holds

     a receiver to his ear from an official phone on the wall.

 

                            SECURITY TFM

                      (to Jack)

                Throwers don't worry about ticking.

                Modern bombs don't tick.

 

                            JACK

                Excuse me?  "Throwers?"

 

                            SECURITY TFM

                Baggage handlers.  But when a

                suitcase vibrates, the throwers have

                to call the police.

 

                            JACK

                My suitcase was vibrating?

 

                            SECURITY TFM

                Nine time out of ten, it's an

                electric razor.  But, every once in

                a while ...

                      (whispers)

                ...it's a dildo.  It's airline policy

                not to imply ownership in the event

                of a dildo.  We use the indefinite

                aricle: "A dildo."  Never "Your

                dildo."

 

     Jack sees, through the window, Tyler, at the curb, throwing

     his briefcase into the back of a shiny, red CONVERTIBLE.

     Tyler leaps over the door into the driver's seat and PEELS

     OUT.  jack turns away, looks at the Security TFM.

 

     In the background, a HARRIED MAN dashes after Tyler and the

     convertible, SCREAMING.

 

                            JACK

                      (to Security TFM)

                I had everything in that bag.  My

                C.K. shirts... my D.K.N.Y. shoes...

 

                            SECURITY TFM

                      (into phone)

                Yeah, uh huh... yeah?

                      (pause, still on phone)

                Oh...

 

     EXT. EMPTY RUNWAY

 

     A lone SUITCASE sits on the concrete.  SECURITY PERSONNEL

     keep their distance.  KABOOM!  The suitcase explodes.

 

     INT. BAGGAGE CLAIM AREA - RESUMING

 

     The Security TFM, shakes his head, hangs up.

 

                           SECURITY TFM

                I'm terribly sorry.

 

     The Security TFM hands Jack a claim form.  Jack snatches it,

     disgusted, takes out a pen, starts filling out the form.

 

                            SECURITY TFM

                You know the industry slang for

                "Flight Attendant?"  "Air Mattress."

 

     INT. TAXI - MOVING - NIGHT

 

     Along a residential street.  Jack looks ahead, sees a tall,

     grey, bland BUILDING on the corner.

 

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Home was a condo on the fifteenth

                floor of a filing cabinet for widows

                and young professionals.  The walls

                were solid concrete.  A foot of

                concrete is important when your next-

                door neighbor lets her hearing aid go

                and has to watch game shows at full

                volume...

 

     The taxi turns a corner and Jack sees the front of the

     building.  A diffuse CLOUD of SMOKE wafts away from a BLOWN-

     OUT SECTION of the fifteenth floor.  FIRETRUCKS, POLICE CARS

     and a MOB are all crowded around the lobby area.

 

                            JACK (V.O.)

                -- Or when a volcanic blast of debris

                that used to be your furniture and

                personal effects blows out your floor-

                to-ceiling windows and sails flaming

                into the night.

 

     EXT. STREET IN FRONT OF BUILDING

 

     Jack, gaping at the sight above him, absently gives the

     Cabbie money.  The taxi pulls away.  Jack starts toward the

     building.  He pushes through the fray of people, into the...

 

     INT. LOBBY

 

     The DOORMAN sees Jack enter, gives a sad smile, shakes his

     head.  Jack starts for the elevator.

 

                            DOORMAN

                There's nothing up there.

 

     Jack presses the button.  The Doorman moves next to him.

 

                            DOORMAN

                You can't go into the unit.  Police

                orders.

 

     The elevator doors open.  Jack hesitates.  The doors close.

     Jack heads out the lobby doors.  The Doorman follows...

 

     EXT. CONDO BUILDING - CONTINUOUS

 

     Jack walks past SMOKING, CHARRED DEBRIS -- a flash of ORANGE

     from the Yang table, a CLOCK FACE from the hall clock, part

     of an arm from the GREEN ARMCHAIR.  His feet CRUNCH glass.

 

                            JACK (V.O.)

                How embarrassing.

 

                            DOORMAN

                Do you have somebody you can call?

 

     Jack comes to his REFRIGERATOR lying on its side.  He

     reaches down and takes a note: "MARLA --" and a phone

     number, from under a BANANA MAGNET.

 

     CLOSE SHOT - JACK'S STOVE

 

     Hissing.

 

                            JACK (V.O.)

                The police would later tell me that

                the pilot light might have gone

                out... letting out just a little bit

                of gas.

 

     EXT. PAYPHONE - RESUMING

 

     Jack gets to a PAYPHONE.  The Doorman follows, watching him.

 

                            DOORMAN

                Lots of young people try to impress

                the world and buy too many things.

 

     Jack picks up the receiver, puts in a quarter.  He looks at

     Marla's number a long moment.

 

     CLOSE SHOT - JACK'S ENTIRE CONDO - KITCHEN AND LIVING ROOM

 

     The SOUND of the HISS...

 

                            JACK (V.O.)

                The gas could have slowly filled the

                condo.  Seventeen-hundred square feet

                with high ceilings, for days and days.

 

     EXT. PAYPHONE - RESUMING

 

     Jack replaces the receiver.  He pockets Marla's number, digs

     out a small FILOFAX.  He flips through the pages for phone

     numbers and addresses.  Most of the pages are blank.

 

                            DOORMAN

                Many young people feel trapped and

                desperate.

 

     INSERT - CLOSE ON THE BASE OF JACK'S REFRIGERATOR

 

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Then, the refrigerator's compressor

                could have clicked on...

 

     Click.  KABOOM!  SCREEN GOES WHITE.

 

     EXT. PAYPHONE - RESUMING

 

     Jack looks at the Doorman.  Tyler's BUSINESS CARD falls from

     the Filofax.  Jack catches it.

 

                            DOORMAN

                If you don't know what you want, you

                end up with a lot you don't.

 

     The Doorman walks away.  Jack stares at Tyler's card.

 

                            JACK (V.O.)

                If you asked me now, I couldn't tell

                you why I called him.

 

     Jack re-deposits the quarter, dials Tyler's number.  It

     RINGS... and RINGS and RINGS.  Jack sighs and hangs up the

     phone.  A moment, then the phone RINGS.

 

                            JACK

                Hello?

 

                            TYLER'S VOICE

                Who's this?

 

                            JACK

                Tyler?

 

                            TYLER'S VOICE

                Who's this?

 

                           JACK

                Uh... I'm sorry.  We met on the

                plane.  We had the same briefcase.

                I'm... you know, the clever guy.

 

                            TYLER'S VOICE

                Oh, yeah.

 

                            JACK

                I just called a second ago.  There

                was no answer.  I'm at a payphone.

 

                            TYLER'S VOICE

                I star-sixty-nined you.  I never pick

                up my phone.  What's up?

 

                            JACK

                Well... let me see... here's the

                thing...

 

     EXT. LOU'S TAVERN - NIGHT

 

     A small building in the middle of a concrete parking lot.

 

     INT. LOU'S TAVERN - SAME

 

     Jack and Tyler sit in the back, with a pitcher of BEER.

 

                            JACK

                You buy furniture.  You tell

                yourself: this is the last sofa I'll

                ever need.  No matter what else

                happens, I've got the sofa issue

                handled.  Then, the right set of

                dishes.  The right dinette.

 

                            TYLER

                This is how we fill up our lives.

 

     Tyler lights a cigarette.

 

                            JACK

                I guess so.

 

                            TYLER

                And, now it's gone.

 

                            JACK

                All gone.

 

     Tyler offers cigarettes.  Jack declines.

 

                            TYLER

                Could be worse.  A woman could cut

                off your penis while you're asleep

                and toss it out the window of a

                moving car.

 

                            JACK

                There's always that.

 

                            TYLER

                I don't know, maybe I'm wrong.  Maybe

                it's a terrible tragedy.

 

                            JACK

                ...no ...no ...

 

                            TYLER

                I mean, you did lose a lot of nice,

                neat little shit.  The trendy paper

                lamps, the Euro-trash shelving unit,

                am I right?

 

     Jack laughs, nods.  He shakes his head, drinks.

 

                            TYLER

                But maybe, just maybe, you've been

                delivered.

 

                            JACK

                      (toasts)

                Delivered from Swedish furniture.

 

                            TYLER

                Delivered from armchairs in obscure

                green stripe patterns.

 

                            JACK

                Delivered from Martha Stewart.

 

                            TYLER

                Delivered from bullshit colors like

                "Cobalt," "Ebony," and "Fuchsia."

 

     They laugh together.  Then, silence.  They drink.

 

                            JACK

                Insurance'll cover it.

 

                            TYLER

                Oh, yeah, you gotta start making the

                list.

 

                            JACK

                What list?

 

                            TYLER

                The "now I get to go out and buy the

                exact same stuff all over again"

                list.  That list.

 

                            JACK

                I don't... think so.

 

                            TYLER

                This time maybe get a widescreen TV.

                You'll be occupied for weeks.

 

                            JACK

                Well, I have to file a claim...

 

                            TYLER

                The things you own, they end up

                owning you.

 

                            JACK

                Don't I?

 

                            TYLER

                Do what you like.

 

                            JACK

                      (looks at watch)

                God, it's late.  I should find a

                hotel...

 

                            TYLER

                A hotel?

 

                            JACK

                Yeah.

 

                            TYLER

                So, you called me up, because you

                just wanted to have a drink before

                you... go find a hotel?

 

                            JACK

                I don't follow...

 

                            TYLER

                We're on our third pitcher of beer.

                Just ask me.

 

                            JACK

                Huh?

 

                            TYLER

                You called me so you could have a

                place to stay.

 

                            JACK

                No, I...

 

                            TYLER

                Why don't you cut the shit and ask if

                you can stay at my place?

 

                            JACK

                Would that be a problem?

 

                            TYLER

                Is it a problem for you to ask?

 

                            JACK

                Can I stay at your place?

 

                            TYLER

                Yes, you can.

 

                            JACK

                Thank you.

 

                            TYLER

                You're welcome.  But, I want you to

                do me one favor.

 

                            JACK

                What's that?

 

                            TYLER

                I want you to hit me as hard as you

                can.

 

                            JACK

                What?

 

                            TYLER

                I want you to hit me as hard as you

                can.

 

     Freeze picture.

 

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Let me tell you a little bit about

                Tyler Durden.