FIGHT CLUB

                                 by

                              Jim Uhls

                          based on a novel by

                            Chuck Palahnuik

                                          2/16/98

     SCREEN BLACK

                            JACK (V.O.)

                People were always asking me, did I

                know Tyler Durden.

     FADE IN:

     INT.  SOCIAL ROOM - TOP FLOOR OF HIGH RISE -- NIGHT

     TYLER has one arm around Jack's shoulder; the other hand

     holds a HANDGUN with the barrel lodged in JACK'S MOUTH.

     Tyler is sitting in Jack's lap.

     They are both sweating and disheveled, both around 30; Tyler

     is blond, handsome; and Jack, brunette, is appealing in a

     dry sort of way.  Tyler looks at his watch.

                            TYLER

                One minute.

                      (looking out window)

                This is the beginning.  We're at

                ground zero.  Maybe you should say a

                few words, to mark the occasion.

                            JACK

                ... i... ann....iinn.. ff....nnyin...

                            JACK (V.O.)

                With a gun barrel between your teeth,

                you only speak in vowels.

     Jack tongues the barrel to the side of his mouth.

                            JACK

                      (still distorted)

                I can't think of anything.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                With my tongue, I can feel the

                rifling in the barrel.  For a second,

                I totally forgot about Tyler's whole

                controlled demolition thing and I

                wondered how clean this gun is.

     Tyler checks his watch.

                            TYLER

                It's getting exciting now.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                That old saying, how you always hurt

                the one you love, well, it works both

                way.

     Jack turns so that he can see down -- 31 STORIES.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                We have front row seats for this

                Theater of Mass Destruction.  The

                Demolitions Committee of Project

                Mayhem wrapped the foundation columns

                of ten buildings with blasting

                gelatin.  In two minutes, primary

                charges will blow base charges, and

                those buildings will be reduced to

                smoldering rubble.  I know this

                because Tyler knows this.

                            TYLER

                Look what we've accomplised.

                      (checks watch)

                Thirty seconds.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Somehow, I realize all of this -- the

                gun, the bombs, the revolution -- is

                really about Marla Singer.

     PULL BACK from Jack's face.  It's pressed against TWO LARGE

     BREASTS that belong to...BOB, 45, a moose of a man.  Jack is

     engulfed by Bob in an intense embrace.  Bob weeps openly.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Bob had bitch tits.

     PULL BACK to wide on...

     INT. CHURCH MEETING ROOM - NIGHT

     Men are paired off, hugging, talking in emotional tones.

     Near the door, a SIGN on a stand: "REMAINING MEN TOGETHER."

                            JACK (V.O.)

                This was a support group for men with

                testicular cancer.  The big moosie

                slobbering all over me was Bob.

                            BOB

                We're still men.

                            JACK

                Yes.  We're men.  Men is what we are.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Six months ago, Bob's testicles were

                removed.  Then hormone therapy.  He

                developed bitch tits because his

                testosterone was too high and his

                body upped the estrogen.  That was

                where my head fit -- into his huge,

                sweating tits that hung enormous, the

                way we think of God's as big.

                            BOB

                They're gonna have to open my pec's

                again to drain the fluid.

     Bob hugs tighter; then looks with empathy into Jack's eyes.

                            BOB

                Okay.  You cry now.

     Jack looks at Bob.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Wait.  Back up.  Let me start earlier.

     INT. JACK'S BEDROOM - NIGHT

     Jack lies in bed, staring at the ceiling.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                For six months.  I could not sleep.

     INT. COPY ROOM - DAY

     Jack, sleepy, stands over a copy machine.  His Starbucks cup

     sits on the lid, moving back and forth as the machine copies.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                With insomnia, nothing is real.

                Everything is far away.  Everything

                is a copy of a copy of a copy.

     Other people make copies, all with Starbucks cups, sipping.

     Jack picks up his cup and his copies and leaves.

     INT. JACK'S OFFICE - SAME

     Jack, sipping, stares blankly at a Starbucks bag on the

     floor, full of newspapers and FAST FOOD GARBAGE.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                When deep space exploration ramps up,

                it will be corporations that name

                everything.  The IBM Stellar Sphere.

                The Philip Morris Galaxy.  Planet

                Starbucks.

     Jack looks up as a pudgy man, Jack's BOSS, enters, Starbucks

     cup in hand, and slides a stack of reports on Jack's desk.

                            BOSS

                I'm going to need you out-of-town a

                little more this week.  We've got

                some "red-flags" to cover.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                It must've been Tuesday.  he was

                wearing his "cornflower-blue" tie.

                            JACK

                      (listless management speak)

                You want me to de-prioritize my

                current reports until you advise of

                a status upgrade?

                            BOSS

                You need to make these your primary

                "action items."

                            JACK (V.O.)

                He was full of pep.  Must've had his

                grande latte enema.

                            BOSS

                Here are your flight coupons.  Call

                me from the road if there are any

                snags.  Your itinerary...

     Jack hides a yawn, pretends to listen.

INT. BATHROOM - JACK'S CONDO - NIGHT

     Jack sits on the toilet, CORDLESS PHONE to his ear, flips

     through an IKEA catalog.  There's a stack of old Playboy

     magazines and other catalogs nearby.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Like everyone else, I had become a

                slave to the IKEA nesting instinct.

                            JACK

                      (into phone)

                Yes.  I'd like to order the Erika

                Pekkari slip covers.

     Jack drops the open catalog on the floor.

     MOVE IN ON CATALOG -- ON PHOTO of COFFEETABLE SET...

                            JACK (V.O.)

                If I saw something like clever coffee

                table sin the shape of a yin and

                yang, I had to have it.

     PAN TO PHOTO of ARMCHAIR...

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Like the Johanneshov armchair in the

                Strinne green stripe pattern...

     INT. LIVING ROOM/DINING AREA/KITCHEN

     The armchair APPEARS.  PAN OVER next to armchair...

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Or the Rislampa wire lamps of

                environmentally-friendly unbleached

                paper.

     The lamps APPEAR.  PAN OVER to wall...

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Even the Vild hall clock of

                galvanized steel, resting on the

                Klipsk shelving unit.

     The clock APPEARS as the shelving unit APPEARS on the wall.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                I would flip through catalogs and

                wonder, "What kind of dining set

                defines me as a person?"  We used to

                read pornography.  Now it was the

                Horchow Collection.

     A dining room set APPEARS.  Jack, the cordless phone still

     glued to his ear, walks INTO FRAME and continues.

                            JACK

                No, I don't want Cobalt.  Oh, that

                sounds nice.  Apricot.

     Jack opens a cabinet, takes out a plate.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                I had it all.  Even the glass dishes

                with tiny bubbles and imperfections,

                proof they were crafted by the

                honest, simple, hard-working

                indigenous peoples of wherever.

     He rummages through the refrigerator.  It's practically

     empty.  Jack takes out a jar of mustard, opens it and uses

     a butter knife to eat it.

     INT. DOCTOR'S OFFICE - DAY

     Jack, eyes puffy, face pale, sits before an INTERN, who

     studies him with bemusement.

                            INTERN

                No, you can't die of insomnia.

                            JACK

                Maybe I died already.  Look at my

                face.

                            INTERN

                You need to lighten up.

                            JACK

                Can't you give me something?

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Red-and-blue Tuinal, lipstick-red

                Seconals.

                            INTERN

                      (overlapping w/ above)

                You need healthy, natural sleep.

                Chew valerian root and get some more

                exercise.

     The Intern ushes Jack to the door.  They step into the...

     INT. HALLWAY

     The Intern walks away from Jack, picks up a chart.

                            JACK

                I'm in pain.

                            INTERN

                      (facetious)

                You want to see pain?  Swing by First

                Methodist Tuesday nights.  See the

                guys with testicular cancer.  That's

                pain.

     The Intern moves into the other room.  Jack stares after him.

     EXT. FIRST METHODIST CHURCH - NIGHT

     Jack heads for the front door.

     INT. FIRST METHODIST CHURCH MEETING ROOM - NIGHT

     Jack stares at a group of men, including Bob, who are all

     listening to a group member speak at a lectern.  The SPEAKER

     has pale skin and sunken eyes -- he's clearly dying.

                            SPEAKER

                I... wanted three kids.  Two boys and

                a girl.  Mindy wanted two girls and

                one boy.  We never could agree on

                anything.

     The Speaker cracks a sad smile.  Some men chuckle, happy to

     lighten the mood.

                            SPEAKER

                Well, she had her first child a month

                ago, a girl, with her new husband...

                And, Thank God.  I'm glad for her,

                because she deserves...

     The speaker breaks down, WEEPS UNCONTROLLABLY.

     Jack watches.  A couple of the men go up to the speaker,

     comforting him, leading him away.  A LEADER takes the stand.

                            LEADER

                Everyone, let's thank Thomas for

                sharing himself with us.

     Jack, uncomfortable, joins EVERYONE ELSE:

                            EVERYONE

                      (in unison)

                Thank you, Thomas.

                            LEADER

                I look around this room and I see a

                lot of courage.  And it gives me

                strength.  We give each other

                strength.

     Jack looks around.  Many of the men are sniffling, sobbing.

     Jack squirms in his seat.

                            LEADER

                It's time for the one-on-one.  Let's

                follow Thomas's example and open

                ourselves.

     Everyone gets out of their chairs and begins pairing-off.

     Jack stands, uncomfortable.

                            LEADER

                Can everyone find a partner?

     Bob, his chin down on his chest, starts toward Jack,

     shuffling his feet.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                The big moosie, his eyes already

                shrink-wrapped in tears.  Knees

                together, invisible steps.

     Bob takes Jack into an embrace.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Bob was a champion bodybuilder.  You

                know that chest expansion program you

                see on TV?  That was his idea.

                            BOB

                ...using steroids.  I was a juicer.

                Diabonol, then, Wisterol -- it's for

                racehorses, for Christsake.  Now I'm

                bankrupt, divorced, my two grown kids

                won't return my calls...

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Strangers with this kind of honesty

                make me go a big rubbery one.

     Bob breaks into sobbing, putting his head on Jack's shoulder

     and completely covering Jack's face.  After a long beat of

     crying, Bob raises up his head, looks at Jack's NAMETAG.

                            BOB

                Go ahead, Cornelius.  You can cry.

     They look at each other.  Slowly, Jack's eyes grow wet.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Then... something happened.  I was

                lost in oblivion -- dark and silent

                and complete.

     Bob pulls Jack's head back into his chest.  Jack tightens

     his arms around Bob.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                I found freedom.  Losing all hope was

                freedom.

     Jack pulls away from Bob.  On Bob's chest, there's a WET

     MASK of Jack's face from how he looks weeping.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Babies don't sleep this well.

     INT. JACK'S BEDROOM - NIGHT

     Jack lies sound asleep.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                I became addicted.

     INT. SMALL PROTESTANT CHURCH - NIGHT

     Jack moves into a "group hug" of sickly people, men and

     women.  In view is a sign by the door "Free and Clear."

     INT. OFFICE BUILDING BASEMENT - NIGHT

     Jack stands with a weeping middle-aged WOMAN.  He begins to

     cry along with her.  A sign by the door: "Onward and Upward."

                            JACK (V.O.)

                If I didn't say anything, people

                assumed the worst.  They cried

                harder.  I cried harder.

     INT. PUBLIC BUILDING CONFERENCE ROOM - NIGHT

     Everyone, including Jack, sits back in their seats, EYES

     CLOSED.  The Leader speaks into a microphone.

                            LEADER

                Tonight, we're going to open the

                green door -- the heart chakra...

                            JACK (V.O.)

                I wasn't really dying, I wasn't host

                to cancer or parasites; I was the

                warm little center that the life of

                this world crowded around.

                            LEADER

                ...And you open the door and you

                step inside.  We're inside our

                hearts.  Now, imaging your pain as a

                white ball of healing light.  That's

                right, the pain itself is a ball of

                healing light.

     Jack, eyes closed, is silent...

                           LEADER

                It moves over your body, healing you.

                Keep this going and step forward,

                through the back door of the room.

                Where does it lead?  To your cave.

                Step forward into your cave.

     INT. CAVE - JACK'S IMAGINATION

     Jack walks along, moving through an ICE CAVERN...

                            LEADER'S VOICE

                That's right.  You're going deeper

                into your cave.  And you're going to

                find your power animal...

     Jack comes upon a PENGUIN.  The penguin looks at him, cocks

     his head to signal Jack forward.

                            PENGUIN

                Slide.

     The penguin jumps onto a patch of ICE and slides away.

     EXT. STREET - NIGHT

     Jack walks out a doorway, saying goodbye to people.  He

     walks down the sidewalk, shining with peace.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Every evening I died and every

                evening I was born again.  Resurrected.

                                                   CUT BACK TO:

     INT. FIRST METHODIST CHURCH MEETING ROOM - RESUMING

     Jack's still in an embrace with Bob.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Bob loved me because he thought my

                testicles were removed too.  Being

                there, my face against his tits,

                ready to cry -- this was my vacation.

     MARLA SINGER enters.  She has short matte black hair and

     big, dark eyes like a character from japanese animation.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                And, she ruined everything.

     Marla looks around, raises a cigarette to her lips.

                            MARLA

                This is cancer, right?

     Bob and Jack stare, dumbfounded.

     INT. FIRST METHODIST CHURCH MEETING ROOM - LATER

     Everyone paired-off.  MOVE THROUGH ROOM... FIND JACK'S FACE

     as he stares... MOVE THROUGH ROOM... FIND MARLA'S FACE.

     She's drinking coffee, smoking a cigarette.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                This ... chick ... Marla Singer ...

                did not have testicular cancer.  She

                was a liar.

     INT. SMALL PROTESTANT CHURCH - NIGHT

     Marla sits with the group, smoking, listening intently while

     a member speaks.  Jack spies on her.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                She had no diseases at all.  I had

                seen her at my melanoma Monday night

                group ...

     INT. CATHOLIC CATHEDRAL - NIGHT

     Marla sits at the end of a row, smoking.  All the faces down

     the row are turned toward her, incredulous...

                            JACK (V.O.)

                ... and at "Free and Clear," my blood

                parasites group Thursdays.

     Jack leans out further than the others, scornful.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                -- And, again, at "Seize The Day," my

                tuberculosis Friday night.

                                                   CUT BACK TO:

     INT. FIRST METHODIST CHURCH MEETING ROOM - ANOTHER NIGHT

     Jack watches... Marla's eyes are closed, her head on the

     shoulder of the MAN she's embraced by.  She opens her eyes,

     catching Jack's stare.  Jack looks away.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Marla -- the big tourist.  Her lie

                reflected my lie.

     Marla rests her chin on the man's shoulder.  Tears roll down

     her cheeks.  She wipes at them.

     EXT. FIRST METHODIST CHURCH - NIGHT

     Marla walks out,  The support group's dispersing.  Jack

     exits amongst them.  He spots Marla walking away.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                And suddenly, I felt nothing.  I

                couldn't cry.  So, once again, I

                could not sleep.

     Jack stares after Marla for a long moment.  He walks away.

     INT. BEDROOM - LATER

     Jack, in underwear, is cross-legged on the floor, assembling

     IKEA furniture, CORDLESS PHONE shouldered to his ear.

                            JACK

                      (into phone)

                No, I just can't believe that card is

                declined -- Okay, okay, let me give

                you a different card number.

     Jack gets his wallet off the floor, pulls out another card

     and, MOS over the following, he reads it into the phone.

                            JACK (V.O.)

                Next group, after guided meditation,

                after we open our chakras, when it's

                time to hug, I'm going to grab that

                little bitch, Marla Singer, pin her

                arms against her sides and say...

     INT. MEETING ROOM - NIGHT - JACK'S IMAGINATION

     CLOSE ON JACK as he CLAMPS his arms around Marla.

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